Aries: You have a spot of good luck on Friday. It’s over there, in the corner, so don’t rearrange the furniture or it will be lost underneath that ratty recliner your sweetie refuses to give up. Could even be enough luck to get rid of that recliner, too.

Taurus: What’s best for you isn’t always what’s convenient; that’s why they sell vodka, cigarettes and cheeseburgers in drive-thrus. Muster up the stamina to step outside your drunken, smoky comfort zone for a few days. You might even see your toes again.

Gemini: While some people practice fire drills, you’ve been running through bull puckey drills. That preparedness will pay this week when your crap detector goes off like a goosed opera singer.

Cancer: You’re not destined for greatness, but you could receive a few minutes of national TV time when someone discovers lost photos you forgot to pick up at Walgreen’s in 1998.  Fame is fleeting, but nicknames like “weird dude in Batman mask and underwear” last forever.

Leo: After a month of fertilizer, everything’s coming up roses. Your nose will appreciate the change in fragrant scenery, although your thumbs will hate you if you forget about the thorns.

Virgo: You’ve been letting it all hang out lately, but everyone around you wishes you would just tuck it back in. Meet them halfway and do up a few buttons; they’ve been scarred enough.

Libra: You have a shot at a big promotion, so now’s the time to stop doing those nasty things to your boss’ coffee. It will be good for you, too, because those scald marks will finally heal.

Scorpio: The universe knows you’ve been through a lot, it’s just tired of hearing you whine about it. Build a bridge and get over it, and karma will let you cash in as toll-taker.

Sagittarius: You know your fears so well, you buy Girl Scout cookies from their kids. It’s time to leave them behind and discover a new neighborhood of possibilities. You’ll have fewer snacks, but more peace of mind.

Capricorn: If your sweetie meets you at the door in nothing but a big red bow, don’t ask if there’s a gift receipt for returns. Your picture could be on that milk carton for years.

Aquarius: Be giving to those who need it and be kind to those who don’t. But if they try to take your parking space while you’re pulling into it, all bets are off.

Pisces: You’ve reached for your dreams for so long, you’re getting arm cramps. Take a week off from the great struggle and invest in Captain America Underoos and some fuzzy bunny slippers. Opportunity won’t care what you’re wearing when it knocks, as long as you’re decent enough to answer the door.

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