Aries: Tit for tat has nothing to do with flashing and tattoos, but that doesn’t mean you can’t make some interesting exchanges this weekend. Whichever side you’re on, don’t forget the sunscreen.

Taurus: There is beauty in every single day, but you’ll never see it through a dirty window. Grab the Windex and start scrubbing; life will look much brighter when you can actually view it up close.

Gemini: You don’t have all the answers, but you do think up some rather entertaining questions. Start a blog or write a book; why be confused alone when you can confound the world?

Cancer:Logic may feel like a foreign country but the least you can do is learn the language. Quit thinking with your crotch and you may even earn a passport.

Leo: If everything’s coming up roses, don’t whine for marigolds. Enjoy your garden, even if it’s just a blooming onion on your plate. Ketchup, anyone?

Virgo: A one-in-a-million chance is heading your way on Friday. Sit out in the driveway with the butterfly net, because a shot like this is rarer than a 60 Minutes interview with Bigfoot. In fact, you might even need a camera crew with you.

Libra: There will be a moment on Thursday afternoon when you doubt everything you’ve accomplished in life. Ride that out, and your all-star chicken steampunk movie idea is on the fast track to success.

Scorpio: A co-worker comes to you with a problem on Tuesday. If you manage to keep a straight face and remove the toner cartridge from their underwear, you’ll win the day.

Sagittarius: You’re feeling more lost than Batman at a family reunion. Don’t worry about feeling out of place, just keep an eye out for the Joker bringing seven-layer bean dip and keep the Bat-Beano at the ready.

Capricorn: You’ve nearly finished a project, now it’s time for that last piece. If it doesn’t fit perfectly, grab the Super Glue, stick that sucker on and call it art. No one will know the difference.

Aquarius: Sometimes doing a great job means severely cutting back on your Internet cat video-watching time. It’s a sacrifice, sure, but if you earn more money you can afford better broadband for those weekend YouTube binges.

Pisces: Don’t freak out, but that weird feeling inside your chest isn’t a heart flutter; it’s contentment mixed with a dash of confidence. It’s not a superpower yet, but it can definitely make you do some amazing things this week.

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